Have you ever asked, “Why me?” Have you ever just sat back and thought to yourself that it shouldn’t be this way? This was not the life that you signed up for. There are few times in my short life that I can look back and definitely say that I got a solid answer to a question that I asked God. One time I asked that very question and lately, I’ve felt the need to share it with all of you.
Most of you who read this know at least to some extent the background for this story. However, if you don’t, consider yourself blessed to have missed out on what I consider to be my darkest hour. Just know that if you missed it, you can be thankful. I wish sometimes that I had, but then again, God taught and is teaching me so much through all of those things that I can now understand how He uses things in His sovereignty that I just don’t get to vote on this side of heaven.
This particular morning, I remember standing in a shower and crying out straight to heaven, “Why ME?! What have I done to deserve this, Lord? Remember me? I did everything right.” Now I’ve never really experienced an answer that I knew was the Lord quite this quickly but almost before the words formed in my mind did was I very quickly hit between the eyes with this – “Elizabeth (yes, He used my name), why NOT you?” No, it wasn’t audible but it was as close to audible as anything I have ever experienced. And right there in that moment, I was forced to grapple with that very question. Thinking about it now makes me laugh a little because I think of how Job wagged his finger at God and asked questions – and God let him but then He asked Job some questions of His own. Maybe He was just turning the question back around on me. Well, not surprisingly, it worked. I started thinking… you know, why not me? When was I ever promised that if I checked a, b, and c off of the religious list I had tallied out in my head that everything would just fall into place with the so called “American Dream?” Where does this sense of entitlement come from? The pits of Hell would be my guess. God promises me abundantly more than I could ever even think to ask for but one thing I haven’t been able to find is where He promises me that my life will be fair and pain free. Know why? Because He promises, His word promises, just the opposite.
There is an old country song that one of my favorite speakers mentioned in a podcast this week. I’ve never heard it but when I heard the title, I dug up the lyrics. Here’s a spin on the Why Me question that so many of us (myself especially included) feel the need to ask. Next time you or I ask Why Me, I hope that I can think about the words to this song and remember instead how truly blessed I am.
Why Me, Lord? Kris Kristofferson
Why me Lord?
What have i ever done to deserve even one of the pleasures I've known?
Tell me Lord, what did I ever do that was worth lovin' you for the kindness you've shown?